Halle-Fuckin-Lujah!!!!!!

jason garrett

Something to be grateful for! The NY Giants have fired OC Jason Garrett after a putrid, cringey and highly embarrassing performance against Tampa Bay last night. The move comes too late to save Big Blue’s pathetic season, but it’s a good starting point.

Garrett was always a bad hire. After 11 mediocre-to-terrible seasons in Dallas, they let him go, and the Giants scooped him up because their standards are so low. As expected, Garrett was incompetent from the start with poor play calling and no help for struggling QB Daniel Jones. It’s a wonder this team has three wins at all. (Yes, the defense is shit, too, but that’s another conversation.)

We have to make sure to correct that. […] I get frustrated for the players. […] We’ve got to make sure we put them in position to have success. I’m not going to debate that.
— Joe Judge

Oh. Deep. Profound.

According to Bleacher Report, Freddie Kitchens will take over the playcalling duties for the remainder of the season. The Giants couldn’t possibly do worse.

I mean, right? RIGHT?

This has to be the launching pad for a complete teardown, though. Every-fucking-body has to go, from the waterboy right up to the front office. No more hiring retreads and other losers with former ties to the franchise. It’s been 10 years (with the exception of 2016, which ended up being fairly meaningless) of absolute bullshit with the losing, the lack of talent, the assclown coaching, the media circus and the endless embarrassment. JOHN MARA, THIS IS ON YOU! MAKE IT FUCKING STOP! YOU’RE IN OVER YOUR HEAD! ASK FOR HELP! YOUR DAD DID! LOOK WHAT HAPPENED! JESUS CHRIST ALREADY!

Ahem.

Anyway. The Giants host the Eagles this Sunday at MetLife. Philly is favored by 3.5, which seems rather conservative. In fact, the Giants will likely find a way to lose by at least 15, no matter who’s calling the plays. Because that’s just the way they roll until Mara blows it up.